in which a Deal is offered

January 22, 2019

Welcome to Corgi-Class Starship, the newsletter that's skipping a podcast episode this week because Plans. Now then: can I level with you? Can I ....... be real with you? [gets out a chair, turns it around, sits in it with arms folded on the backrest] I got a request from a friend and reader that I'm paraphrasing as "I love this newsletter and you, but since we all probably know the deal with Instant Band Night by now, how about leaving it out, because I don't so much love scrolling for a billion miles to get past it?" Which I 100% understand!Here's the thing: I need more people to come to Instant Band Night.Don't get me wrong: it's been good, but I think it can be better, and for that to happen I need a bunch more people to show up. So here's the deal I'll make with all y'all: by the time the sun comes up on Friday, if I see at least 10 people get tickets to Instant Band Night 9, I'll forego putting the whole schpiel in the next issue. You don't have to go yourself! Think of some people you know in the Bay area and invite them on Facebook or send them the Eventbrite link. Forward them this very newsletter?? However you wanna do it, I'm not here to tell you what to do, just get 10 people to commit to showing up, and you will be spared the indignity of having to scroll past all the event info the next time I send this thing out. What a delightful deal!! (Also, let me know if you heard the last few sentences in the voice of Garfield the Deals Warlock; I just need to know there's someone else down here in this trash pile with me) 

You'll Like This

Update(s) on thing(s) I made or somehow helped to bring about.Instant Band Night 9: PI DAYThere could be no other name for it because that's when it's happening. Come and:- Eat pie- Play music- Listen to musicOr whatever combination of those three most appeals to you. LET'S MAKE THIS HAPPEN.Instant Band Night, in case you're wondering, is a party where musicians who've just met form bands on the spot -- you can join in as you like, or just watch what happens!(1)The first rule of Instant Band Night is: 👏 YOU 👏 DON'T 👏 HAVE 👏 TO 👏 PLAY 👏 AN 👏 INSTRUMENT 👏 TO 👏 ATTEND. 👏 Just come watch if you want, because:(2)The second rule of Instant Band Night is: We guarantee you (the audience) an astonishingly excellent time.(3)The third rule of Instant Band Night is: Invite your friends!!!!!!!Here's the rundown:1. The stage has a drum kit, guitar, bass, keyboard, and mics.2. We draw names out of hats to make instant bands that get 7 minutes in the green room to plan a 5-minute set.3. A hat-drawn artist will also take the stage alongside each band to draw their gig poster on a meeting room easel pad.Come play or come watch; either way, it'll be the highlight of your week. FACTS.Thursday March 14 (PI DAY)507 55th St 946098p$5/personBYOB21+Since it's Pi Day, feel free to bring a pie??? (you're not required to, obvs)- Store-bought is fine- Don't forget the plates/forksForward this to anyone you think would have a good time there, or use these Facebook and Eventbrite links if that's more your thing, and* * *  w e ' l l * s e e * y o u * t h e r e * * *~~ Please enjoy this lightly-expanded F.A.Q. ~~Q: Do I need to be a musician to show up?A: No. Absolutely not. Hell no. Come see the show and have a good time; you don't have to get onstage.Q: I'm a musician; am I guaranteed a slot in a band?A: We literally draw names written on slips of paper out of coffee cans, so there's a chance you may not be called; in a purely mathematical sense, it's a function of how many musicians of each type show up that night (there are five musician cans -- DRUMS, GUITAR, BASS, VOX, MISC -- and one can for artists who'll be picked to draw the bands' gig posters). We say: surrender to the spirit of random chance, or maybe slip the MC a bribe of some sort.Q: Do I have to be an amazing musician to throw my name in a can?A: Probably not. Your band's only gonna be onstage for 5 minutes, anyway; how bad can you possibly be?Q: I play an instrument other than what'll be onstage, like the sax or trumpet. Can I bring it?A: Hhhheeeeeelll yyyeeeessssss you can bring it. PLEASE DO. We had a guy bring a bassoon once, and he rocked the living shit out of it -- and, by extension, us. Woodwinds and brass, which tend not to need extra amplification for a space of this size beyond being pointed vaguely at a mic, are most welcome. If your instrument requires an amp, that's cool, but you should get in touch with Jon about showing up early for setup.Q: Do I have to pick my cover tune beforehand?A: Listen. You and your band (who you've JUST MET) have 5 minutes onstage to do whatever the hell you can think of in the 7 minutes prior to walking up there. You wanna try to pick a cover everyone can agree on? Great. You wanna try writing something new? Fantastic; it can definitely be done. You wanna pick a key and tell each other to just fuckin' wing it up there? You are a RAGING PSYCHOPATH and we love it. We'll see you in 7; get in the green room!!!!Q: What does BYOB stand for?A: We don't sell drinks at Instant Band Night, so you gotta bring your own. Get a cheap sixpack of something. Maybe a bottle and some cups. We're not here to godmod how you get down.Q: Is this in the East Bay?A: It is. Do not be alarmed: it's within walking distance of MacArthur BART, and as a bonus, you get to tour the delightful, scenic Temescal district on your way over. Or you could just take a Lyft from SF (or the BART station if you fancy). Got a car? Drive on over; parking around the East Bay Community Space is pretty simple. You can do this. We believe in you.Q: I can't make it, and I feel a little bad about it. Am I good?A: The only cure is to think of a few friends of yours who live in the Bay and enjoy fun, then forward this to them or send them the invite or whatnot. 

Medium Ramble

Skippable if you're in a hurry.Not a whole lot to tell you about this time around, folks, except that all signs seem to point to True Detective s03 being at least vaguely comparable to s01 -- certainly light years beyond the bleak misery of s02 (which I didn't even finish). I like that it's only going to be eight episodes long; unlike certain Marvel shows, True Detective knows where the fat is and cuts accordingly. I will note that the end credits song they picked for s03e01 is one hell of an earworm. 

#dadthoughts

Also skippable if you're in a hurry or don't care. No judgment.Quentin's nap schedule is doing some weird shit right now. Basically, he's having an extra long morning nap, and an afternoon one that's somewhat delayed (understandably), to the point where it kind of encroaches on his dinnertime. Mavis has received wisdom from other parents that this is basically how it works: just as you get used to one routine, he eats and sleeps a bunch, goes up a level in one or more abilities, and establishes a whole different routine. I guess we'll see what happens? Watch this space.Pursuant to last week's account of the missing mallet and such: one of the pieces from the puzzle thing, a blue coal car for a train, has been gone for at least four days and counting. The puzzle thing also has a cop car on it that's easily the most well-traveled piece: it's been discovered inside his stroller and even under our own bed, which is surprising since he doesn't get access to our room super often or for very long. Now taking bets on when and where the coal car will turn up. 

Fascination Corner

I read a lot of newsletters; here are some links that caught my eye. 

A Fictional Thing

Something made-up that somehow suggested itself to me and which I could not escape.Some bandsDADBRADThe Nervous VegansVictory Hug 

Thanks

If you've read this far, I thank you. Feel free to forward this to someone you like, or inflict upon someone you don't.